Obsession of the week

I get these crazy obsessions that will usually last about a week, sometimes more, sometimes less. Anyway, this weeks is cloth diapers. I really don't have to be thinking about this just yet since I am not pregnant and not planning to become pregnant anytime soon. Hell, I don't even know if I can get pregnant (more on that later). Anyway, I have been interested in using cloth diapers for a few years now but yesterday I decided to do some research on them. Let the obsession begin. I found some wonderful ones out there that will be easy to use, cut down the cost of diapers big time, and they are really cute. The ones I like the most are gdiapers. I heard about these a few years ago but they have changed them a bit. They used to just have disposable inserts that went in them. The inserts could be flushed, tossed, or composted (wet only). Even if you did toss them, they broke down a lot faster than regular disposable diapers. Anyway, after doing research on these a while back, I figured that this really isn't cheaper than regular disposable diapers, only better for the earth. The inserts cost about as much if not more than regular diapers. Anyway, I saw yesterday that they now make cloth inserts that can be washed and reused! Plus I read that a lot of people use regular prefold diapers (what a lot of people use as burp cloths) and just stick those in there. They are of course a lot cheaper. I also found a few others that I liked but not as much. BumGenius is one brand. There are two types that I like, the 3.0 which is a pocket style and the AIO which is all one piece. I like that they are one size with snaps to make them smaller. However, I'm not sure but I think you have to change the whole thing every time (I know you do with the AIO). With the gdiapers, you only have to change the insert unless the liner or the cover is dirty. There is also a new one out that is similar to the gdiaper. It is called flip. It also has a disposable insert option. I also like that this one is a one size diaper (unlike the gdiaper). However, the disposable liner is not flushable. I think I would mostly use the gdiaper or the flip with cloth inserts. I would also have the disposable inserts for going out so that I don't have to bring home wet or soiled cloth diapers. They would especially be handy for weekends in Michigan because it cuts down on the amount of laundry I would have to bring home with me.

Okay, enough about that.

Yesterday I finished my Christmas shopping. Well, except for Rob. I still don't know what I am going to get him. I will have to wait until just before Christmas to get his gift though because I am now broke for the next two weeks. But at least I have a full tank of gas and the rent is paid. My next paycheck is mostly going towards my credit card bills. I will be left with just a little which I hope is enough for dinner on Sunday night. We are having our Nanny Circle Holiday party and we are going out to eat. I also need to use a little money to get stuff to make cheese cake for Rob. Saturday is his birthday so that will be his present. I wish I had the money to buy him something but money is tight this year and he understands that.

Speaking of my credit cards, I guess I will post about that. A few years ago, I ran up some pretty high balances on some credit cards. While I was working at the daycare, I was not making enough to pay some of my bills so I would pay them with credit cards. Never good but what could I do? Anyway, only making minimum payments and sometimes not even on time was really starting to hurt. The balances kept getting higher (even though I was no longer using them) so the minimum payments kept getting higher as well. Finally, it became too much so I called a debt consolidation company. I know what they say about them, that it is a waste of money because you can do what they do yourself. Well, honestly, I didn't want to have to deal with all of that. I have to say, that making that call was probably the best thing I have done for myself financially. Ever. My payment is high, but no where near what I would be paying each month in minimum payments. I also don't have to deal with all of the debt collectors calling me because all calls have been forwarded to this company. Plus, I can see it working. They send me an e-mail every time they settle one of my debts. It tells me how much they settled for too. And, I know that the payments are being made because I still get e-mails from the credit card companies thanking me for my payments. So far, two are fully paid off and Friday I just received an e-mail saying that they settled a third debt so that one will be paid off soon too. Yes, I still stress about it and I will until everything is finally paid off but I think that I would be far worse off if I were trying to deal with this on my own. One of the things that is worrying me, however, is that my car is a lease and the lease is up in March meaning that I either have to buy it out (finance) or find another car to lease. I'm worried that my credit is going to make that hard. I don't have anything saved for a down payment or even for a junker. But, what I have been told by the debt solution people and by a dealer, since I am still making my car payment every month plus having good leasing history with my apartment, I shouldn't have too much of a problem. I hope they are right. What I would really like is to lease a new Jetta.

While on the subject of stress and the mention earlier about not being able to get pregnant, I guess I will explain that one. Wow, this is turning out to be a personal blog today. Oh well, I don't care. I don't think anyone reads it and if so, that is fine. Anyway, just a warning to any guys who may be reading and don't want to hear about woman issues, just skip this. So I haven't had a period since April. I have always been pretty regular except once when I was really stressed. It was actually when I was in Maine working for my first family. I was about to leave them and move back to Michigan. A move in itself can be stressful but I was also losing a job without having a new one first. Not to mention that I was very torn about my decision to leave and upset about leaving the girls and the parents which I became (still am) very close and attached to. Anyway, I'm guessing it was stress but I was about three weeks late. I have always been right on usually to the day if not a day or two off. So it happened again This past December, a year ago. I completely missed a period or I was four weeks late, however you want to look at it. I took several tests and they were all negative. I finally went for a blood test which was also negative. Finally my period came right around the time it should have in January. February's came on time but March's never came. April's came on time and that was the last one I ever had. In may I was expecting it right around the end of my trip to Maine but it never came. Finally I stopped waiting for it. I really do enjoy not having a period and it probably saves me some money. Although, the amount I have spent in pregnancy tests probably more than makes up for that. See the problem with not having a period is, you don't know if you are pregnant or not. Also, this is a big concern for me. It is not normal and there is something going on. However, I don't have insurance or the money to see a doctor. In January I have an extra paycheck and I am torn between going to the doctor or saving it for a down payment on a new car. Anyway, I did some research and it could be a number of things. It could just be stress (see above for one of the reasons I am stressed), it could be a thyroid issue, or it could be PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) which is a hormonal imbalance which also makes it hard to get pregnant (obviously if it has stopped my menstrual cycle). Plus, not knowing what is going on with me and knowing that I need to go to the doctor but can't afford to, is only adding to my stress. The stress is starting to affect (or is it effect?) other parts of my life. It makes me moody and irritable, it makes me feel depressed at times, and I'm afraid that it is going to affect my relationship with with Rob. For the record, he has been really understanding and just overall great about this but it still makes me feel bad. It is also hurting my sex drive (which incidentally is needed to make a baby). So, to sum up this very personal part of my blog, I am lacking two things that are needed to make a baby, ovulation and sex. So why am I still obsessed with cloth diapers?

Wow, I think I need to end this. Well, if I did have any readers before, I'm sure I don't now. It would be fun to know if people were reading though. If anyone is, I don't care who, leave me a comment.